Softening your stools

We have just woke up and the first thing that we do

Well in my case shuffle slowly across the landing to the loo

I lower myself slowly and take up my position

As thoughts begin to turn to completion of my mission

First the sound of rushing water as it swirls around the bowl

Phew that’s the bladder emptied and me back in control

Then a deathly silence as your waiting for the drop

That reassuring sound of plop,plop,plop.

But for Parky pals plop, plop, often never comes

Why not we ask as we all feel a rumble in our tums

Yep the fun of having Parkinson’s unlike most of the nation

Is that missing plop, plop sound we all know as constipation.

So we sit there in the silence except for the rumble in our tummy

Yes any minute now please come on this isn’t funny.

So we huff and we puff as we struggle and we strain

Our face looks quite a picture as it mirrors all our pain.

Yes it’s been a good half hour now waiting to hit gold

But all thats actually happened is we‘re getting rather cold

So we limp back to the bedroom accepting our defeat

And snuggle with our partner to warm those frozen feet

The mission plan moves on as we consider the new rules

We must persuade our stomach to soften up those stools

We can help with what we eat like grapes, pears and prunes

Green beans, not Heinz, peppers too but hell no cameroon’s

There’s whole grain bread, brown rice and oats, did someone mention curry

Yep curry’s fine red chillies too so there’s no need to worry

Don’t forget to rehydrate, unfortunately not with beer

Just 4 litres of water that’s crisp and cool and clear. ( yuk)

So I hope this rhyme has helped you think about those pesky stools

And helps your bowels in their quest to play by normal rules.

Cos struggling and straining isn’t that much fun.

Let’s spend less time on the loo and still get the job done