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Writer's pictureJohn Wood

Slug Wars

How do I thwart them? Let me count the ways:

I'll thwart them by whatever crazy means

I can devise to save my runner beans -

Those evil gastropods who nightly graze

The tenderest shoots and leaves, but spend their days

A wolf pack of terrestrial submarines

That waits to chomp my crop to smithereens,

Come dusk, in mottled greens and stripy greys .


I've tried the buried jar of drown-in ale

I've picked them off the leaves at midnight - YUCK!

Tried pet hair, copper wire and wood ash trail

And sprayed with nematodes but still no luck

It seems my every ploy is doomed to fail

But wait - I've an idea: I'll get a duck!

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3 Comments


YES - get a duck! Brilliant love this.

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the never ending battle, slugs, moles, pidgeons, cabbage white. i feel for you and all us gardeners. I like the rhyme format, two 4 line stanzas together and then an interesting six, makes for a good read

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Ah the old enemy. I've admitted defeat now in the face of overwhelming numbers

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