Eating soup— I always refer to my Parkinson’s as Cecil. This gives me someone to fight against and takes away any semblance of power or control that it may have over me. I wrote this for an open mic.

Eating soup.

Things have changed since Cecil came along,

Things were going nicely until then,

Strange things started happening and stuff started going wrong,

I’ve had to re-adjust and learn some stuff again.

The main thing is the shaking in my hands,

As you can probably see,

This has made me less dextrous and nimble,

Forced me to think about problems differently .

It’s the little things that I find most difficult to do,

Like doing up buttons, threading zips and tying laces,

and sometimes my legs go to sleep when I sit down,

And I find it difficult to walk in crowded places.

I’ve nearly got it sorted though,

I’ve developed some new techniques, that I’ve nearly mastered,

I have to take things slowly, and concentrate,

Mind you, eating soup is still a bit of a bastard.

Another thing I have noticed that’s started happening to me,

Since Cecil first appeared at my door,

Is that I’m finding it increasingly difficult to strum my ukulele,

and no….., that is NOT a metaphor

I can’t seem to get the technique or the timing right,

Sometimes it drives me completely crackers,

mind you , looking on the bright side,

I’m in absolute wizard on the maracas .

Cocktail shaker, I’m good at that as well,

If it says shake well before opening on the tin of paint, then I’m the guy,

Mind you I’m no good at the actual painting these days,

you should see my cutting in , It’s enough to make a tradesmen cry.

There is another thing that has altered quite dramatically,

Where I’ve had to adapt and change things around,

That’s when I’m out in public and I need to have a wee,

Because it’s easier these days if I sit down .

So he’s a little tip for any gentleman here tonight,

Should I end up standing next to you, in the loo,

Give me plenty of space would be my advice

Especially if you’re wearing sandals or you’ve got expensive shoes.

Incidentally,

I’ve been practising vigourously all week,

Sometimes as much as twice daily,

on a totally , brand knew , fingering technique,

To help me when I Strum my ukulele

it involves a subtle wrist action and a completely different grip,

but more of that some other time

and No…. that’s not a metaphor either,

honestly, I think you’ve got a one track mind ?

So much has changed since Cecil came to stay,

And the only way forward I can see,

Is to continue to adapt and try and find a different way,

Of solving problems like,eating soup, cutting in, and having a wee.

Mark Crump feb 2024©️