* * * * *

It's 8am on a Saturday

And the Asda delivery's late

They've sent me a text to say that I'm next

So I limp out to open the gate.

They say that my driver is Jonathan;

They have only got medium sliced bread

And this morning they're clean out of broccoli

So they've sent me a lettuce instead.

Well Jonathan shows up eventually

He's recently moved from Sheerness

He thinks it's a pity United beat City

And I tell him I couldn't care less.

He's hoping to open a coffee bar

His wife is an excellent cook

She's also a talented novelist

But no-one will publish her book.

I tell him I like to write poetry

To put on the Parkinson's Wall

Would he be averse to appearing in verse?

He assures me he wouldn't at all.

He offers to help with the packing

Is there anything else he can do?

He couldn't be "warmer or friendlier"

So I'm posting this five star review.